My Smile Wind
by Falcon Strife
Summary: -Complete- Used to be 'Best Friend'. It's hard when the one you care for protects you.
1. Chapter 1

Best Friend  
  
I sat by the hospital bed, holding the cold, limp hand.  
"Idiot," I whispered weakly. "Don't you die for me."  
An earlier battle was fresh in my mind. I was attacked. Attacked for a mistake my father made. I wondered how the world was becoming the way it was, then sighed sadly.  
I had been visiting my best friend, hoping to make amends for past quarrels and misunderstandings. Hoping to tell him of a secret I had held for quite some time. I cursed myself for choosing that day to make the visit.  
"Idiot," I repeated angrily. "You always have to be stubborn, don't you?!" I demanded angrily.  
The time passed silently from there, and finally a doctor came in. "Visiting hours are over," she said quietly. "He can't hear you anyway."  
I stared quietly at my friend. This was no way to be spending life. Bedridden and hooked up to machines. Especially when he of all people was supported by them.  
"You can always come back tomorrow," the doctor suggested gently.  
Slowly I stood and left the room, knowing I had no other choice.  
"Is he..." our friends began shakily.  
I shook my head to reply to their unfinished question, then began walking, ignoring the sounds of their despair.  
That night I lay awake in my bed, staring at the ceiling. Images of my friend taking the attack meant for me were beginning to haunt me. I closed my eyes and pulled the pillow over my head, trying to force myself to forget the image. When it failed, I sighed and spent the night, tossing and turning, unable to sleep and wondering why. Why couldn't I be stronger? Why couldn't I be the one in that terrible place.  
  
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Wanna take a guess at who's POV this is in and who the best friend is? It won't be revealed yet, so take a guess and leave a review. Chapter 2 should go up in the next week. Ato de! ^_~ 


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter ~ 2  
  
Why did that witch have to keep me all day? She knew I wanted to see him, and she still forced me to train all day. I should have just ignored her. But then again, she has a tendency of over disciplining people. Did she even care that he was hurt?  
I sighed quietly as I entered the hospital. I hoped today he would be awake, so I could tell him why I constantly yelled at him. But more so, I hoped he would be awake so he could yell at me for being too slow. For making him take that hit for me. I'd sooner live so he could hate me, rather than die so he could protect me.  
Slowly I made my way to the room, and as I did, I began to wonder what on the gods' green Earth made me like him in the first place. He wasn't exactly the wittiest fish in the sea. In fact, he was downright annoying a lot of times. Rarely taking things seriously, and often trying to act like laughter could make things all better.  
I'd be damned if I /b told anybody I liked him. Maybe if it were Horokeu, it would be different, or even that irritating ex-gangster, Ryunosuke. But of all people, it was this pest. I'm pretty sure even Yoh wouldn't be able to resist making fun of me. But he's an odd one, so there's always a chance he may be jealous of him, or angry that I would be with him when I treat him terribly at times.  
I came to a stop at the door and stared at it nervously. Do I really want to go through that door? What if he's awake? What if he's not awake? What if... Ah, Hell! Just do it!  
So I throw open the door, and to my surprise, he isn't there. The bed is empty. I frown angrily at myself for not making sure he was in the same room, then blink when a hand rests on my shoulder.  
"Are you looking for somebody?" the blunette doctor asks me.  
"Yeah. My friend Chocolove," I stated cooly.  
"May I ask who you are?" he replied.  
"Tao Ren," I replied with a quirked eyebrow.  
"Oh, I see. Your sister called and asked that I speak to you."  
And so reluctantly I followed the doctor to his office. And of course the following conversation was accented with awkwardness while he tried to explain these many scientific/medical terms I wasn't very familiar with. It probably meant something I wouldn't like. Finally I bluntly told him to tell me what happened.  
He looked at me as if I were an imbecile, but then his expression saddened. It sort of reminded me of Syruba when Hao killed Yoh that one time. "Ren, to put it simply, Chocolove," he winced at the sound of the strange name, "he was too weak. He didn't make it through the night."  
Okay. Take subtle, deep breaths. Don't allow any emotion to show. Just think about how annoying he was. Think about how many times he humiliated me and Horo Horo. "So he died," I said cooly.  
"Bluntly, yes," he replied. "It was sudden and there was no pain, though."  
"What does that matter?" I asked as I stood. "It doesn't change the fact that he died. Now if you're done, I have to be on my way." And with that I turned and walked out. 


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter ~ 3  
  
And I spent the rest of the evening, just walking. Walking and thinking about that idiot. Not once did he ever try to sacrifice himself for me. Not before. So why now? Why was this time so special? I don't think he could have possibly known that I sort of... Well... Sort of...  
"Ugh! Fine! I liked him!" I finally yell at myself. I didn't intend for it to be out loud. It just kind of happened. I groaned as people eyed me strangely, then began walking. Focus on something else. The ignorant humans who polluted our once beautiful world. The space trash that pretends to be the guiding stars.  
Finally I looked up. I hadn't even realized I walked into a video store and was staring at some dubbed movie about a man who finds a magical green mask. I don't even like television, so why the hell am I staring at a piece of plastic that will play a stupid comedy movie?  
Okay... So maybe I liked him a lot. That doesn't mean I should want to watch these stupid movies. Hmph. Hanging around Yoh and his friends is really starting to warp my brain. Maybe I aughta go back to China for a few months. Get back on track. Yeah, that's what I gotta do. But then knowing Yoh, he'll follow me, telling me he's worried or something.  
Geez. Now I'm walking into the apartment. I hadn't even realized I rented that stupid movie. Well, may as well put it to use. So I carelessly shove the stupid piece of plastic in this idiot contraption and hit the button, which according to Jun, will make the movie play.  
Once everything was set, I lazily plopped on the couch and stared at the TV, trying to make some sense out of what was being done and said. It made sense if this human, who persist to put the stupid mask on, was being inhabited by a spirit. But what the heck is so funny about it? A possessed human is a sign of a weak spirit, which is quite disgusting to think of.  
An hour and a half later, I still didn't see what was so funny. I groaned as I shut off the bothersome contraptions, then sat down and stared at the table. 


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter ~ 4  
  
"Did you finally enjoy Smile-Wind?" an all too familiar voice asked.  
I looked up slightly, then blinked when I found that idiot's spirit watching me with his idiotic smile. "If you're dead, why are you still here?" I asked cooly.  
"Funny thing, actually," Chocolove said while rubbing the back of his head. "I've got a slight attachment."  
"And that would be what? To give children nightmares about clowns like yourself?" I asked with annoyance. As if he wasn't annoying enough in life, now he was gonna pester me in his afterlife.  
"Clowns?" Chocolove repeated, then took a thoughtful expression. "Clowns... Clowns..." He sighed some. "It is no use."  
I blinked. He didn't come up with a pun? The only other time I had seen that happen was when he was nervous of Yoh after finding out the Asakura twins were actually the divided reincarnation of King Hao. "What's wrong?" I reluctantly asked, keeping my usual icy tone. "Like I told myself before. Subtle breaths and don't show emotions. That's the safest way to live life, and especially in these situations.  
"Well, I feel I cannot leave until I tell you something," he said sheepishly.  
"Oh? And what would that be?" I asked, making sure I didn't seem like I wanted to know, even though I wanted to. Damn. How did life get to be so complicated? I would have to hit Yoh later, since he seemed to be the major cause of all of the new complications in my life.  
"Well you see, Ren, I'm happy for you!" he said with a grin.  
"Happy for me?" I stared at the idiot, not sure if I should be angry or weirded out.  
"Yes. In fact, I'm very happy for you. So happy that I can't remember what straight means."  
I looked at him with confusion. "What does straight have to do with being happy?" Oh dear God... His eye did that damned twinkle it always does when he's about to victimize somebody with a terrible joke. And this time I can't punish him for it.  
"You see, Ren, it is quite simple," he said as he took a preaching posture. "Another way to say 'happy' is to say 'gay'. And another meaning for 'gay' is 'homosexual'. 'Straight' ties in because it can also mean 'heterosexual'."  
Man. I'm pretty sure this vein in my neck is about to explode. Maybe I could send this idiot to Hell for treating me like this. I can't believe I could ever care for somebody like him. "Chocolove, get out!" I yelled.  
The African-Mexican shaman stared at me in confusion, then just gave me that stupid smile again. I swear, I always thought Horo had the most annoying grin in the world. His was nothing compared to this grin Chocolove kept giving me. Why does he persist to torture me with his presence?! And in more ways than one, I might add. Then to my surprise, he looked at me like a normal person.  
"Ren, my attachment is a secret. I'm pretty sure I know what you'll think when I tell you, but just knowing that you know will let me rest in peace. I'm in love with you."  
..... 


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter ~ 5  
  
.....  
Okay... Not exactly what I was expecting him to say. Not exactly what I would have ever thought he would say. Now I know he's playing with me. So I frowned at him angrily. "Chocolove, get out. You are not funny in anyway."  
"I'm not kidding, Ren," he replied. "That's why I always use you in my jokes. It gets your attention that way."  
My eyes felt as if they would pop out of their sockets from being so wide. He was being serious for once in his life. Well, existence, I guess, since he isn't exactly alive right now.  
He grinned again then walked over and, much to my mixed annoyance and satisfaction, kissed me.  
A cold, tingly feeling shot through my lips that moments later registered in my head as a blissful feeling. So now I was back to trying to not show emotion and keep myself calm inside. For somebody with huge lips, I'm willing to bet he would have had a great kiss when he was alive, judging by the satisfaction I found in just this.  
"Ren, are you okay?" Chocolove's voice asked curiously.  
I blinked, then my eyes widened, realizing I did something. What it was, I'm not sure of, but I can guess. "What do you mean?" I asked slowly, trying to keep calm.  
"You sighed like you liked that," he replied, a stunned expression on his face.  
Shit.  
"Um... Ren? I can't cross over until I know for sure how you feel," he reminded, that idiot smile returning.  
Dammit. I can't lie to him. Not after all the time I have spent around Yoh. It'd crush him, and I probably wouldn't be able to live comfortably with myself. But to come straight out with the 'l' word. How was I, Tao Ren, supposed to do /i?!  
"Well?"  
Sometimes pressure makes you do stupid things. "I love you too," I muttered as I looked away, disgusted with myself for saying it, but at the same time quite content that I had told him myself. Weird how a person can feel opposite emotions at the same time. And he'll know it's the truth, because I never kid about such things.  
"Really?" he asks anyway.  
"Ugh! I said it, didn't I?! What more do you want?!" I yelled.  
He just grinned at me. "Nothing more. I'm glad you feel the same way, Ren. I hope that one day you find your Smile-Wind, though."  
I watched as he faded away. Damn I feel like kicking myself now.  
But...  
I did something I never thought I would do. I helped somebody I cared about to rest in peace. It feels pretty damn good, too. Dammit. I've turned into a real wimp. I should have told Chocolove off when I had the chance!  
He said he loved me. He kissed me. And he knew I enjoyed it.  
Man... Sometimes I hate the sensitivity the others tricked me into developing. But at the same time, I kinda like it.  
For some wacked reason, I like knowing that idiot comedian knows how I feel for him. And I like knowing how he feels for me. Somehow, the need to surpress pain and tears is no longer there, because now I don't feel pain or the need for those tears.  
And I can't help but to smile to myself.  
He cared. He genuinely cared, and he didn't try to harm me the way others probably would. I think that now I know what you always sought, Chocolove. Any reason to smile, no matter how little it may be.  
I think I found my Smile-Wind. 


End file.
